Intergenerational Trauma Therapy in Chicago, IL

Intergenerational Trauma Therapy in Chicago, IL

Have you been taught growing up to silence your voice in a room full of adults, only to find that same belief is causing stress and conflict in your relationships today? You've likely taken on the role of a caregiver or pseudo-parent from a young age for those around you, believing that prioritizing others makes you a “good and helpful person”. Saying 'no' felt disrespectful to elders, and you were always the 'responsible one,' taking care of everyone—except now, you're struggling to communicate your own needs, wants, and boundaries. Your plate of responsibilities seem to be getting more and more complicated because to let others know that you’re struggling seems weak and irresponsible. You need to keep going, but you’ve been constantly feeling burnt out, irritable, and distracted. It’s not appropriate to “air out the dirty laundry” to strangers. 

intergenerational trauma therapy

Growing up in an immigrant household, I witnessed how harmful communication patterns, beliefs, and behaviors can be passed down through generations. Many of us strive to differentiate ourselves from these patterns to prevent them from affecting our own children. Taking time for self-reflection and awareness isn't selfish; it's an act of self-compassion. By doing so, we can choose to pass on family heirlooms of love and resilience rather than the burdens of family trauma. I know firsthand how scary and vulnerable it can feel to reach out for support—especially when you’re used to being the one everyone leans on. Asking for help can stir up feelings of embarrassment, shame, or guilt, and change is hard. But pushing through that discomfort and finding your inner resilience is so worth it. I believe life’s ebbs and flows are inevitable, and therapy can help you find comfort in uncertainty, manage overwhelming emotions, and reduce anxiety. If you experience perfectionism, over-promising, and constantly feeling overwhelmed, let’s work together to break these patterns. 

 

My name is Shirley, and I provide mental health therapy in Chicago, IL!

Hi, I’m Shirley Khong, LCPC (#180.015179) and I provide mental health therapy for individuals and couples in Chicago, IL. I help kindhearted people who are constantly taking care of others break unhealthy patterns that create stress and anxiety. Those who are tired from feeling out of control, shrinking yourself, or that you don’t have a voice worth listening to.

I am located in Chicago, IL and provide online therapy for those in Illinois.

Book a free 15-minute consult with me via Zoom to see if therapy is right for you and how I can best support you. Let's create a personalized plan to help you move beyond anxiety and depression, starting your journey to relief sooner.

How I can help!

We figure out our own way to allow the vulnerable parts of ourselves to unfold naturally without pressure that you are letting you, me, or others down. I don’t put pressure on you to tell me everything that is going on from the start. We will go at your pace and I will check in with you, to make sure you feel heard, understood, and respected. If something feels like it is too much for a particular day, we can come back to it in the following session. There’s no pressure. We start where you are for the day.

With consistent support, you will begin to carve out your desired life, gradually building the confidence to express your true self. You will learn to get out of your shell and speak your truth. You will learn the beauty and strength of your vulnerabilities to help you to be more in-touch with yourself and others. You will learn the importance of boundaries and what it means to take up space. You will be free to explore different avenues of personal and professional growth. You may leave toxic and unhealthy situations or relationships to bring more balance and calm into your life.

When challenges arise, you will feel equipped to navigate them with resilience. You learn to sit comfortably with difficult emotions like fear, shame, guilt, and anxiety, no longer overwhelmed by them. Speaking up for yourself becomes not just a possibility, but a necessity you truly believe in because YOU are worth it.

I'm here to help you create a quiet space for reflecting on what YOU want from life, giving you permission to be unapologetically yourself.

Take the first step today and schedule a 15-minute consultation.

 

FAQs

  • Some individuals may achieve their desired outcomes in about 8-12 sessions, while others may benefit from longer-term therapy.

  • In each session, we reflect upon the previous one to open up discussion if there were any lingering questions, comments, or concerns. I always make sure to meet my clients where they are at for the day.

    Some clients come in with an agenda and we focus on one at a time. Others may not have specific issues to address, and in such cases, we observe the dynamics that unfold during our conversations. Those patterns may lead to insights that they did not notice before.

  • For individual sessions, my rate is $210 for a 50 minute session. I use Reimbursify for my Out-of-Network client insurance reimbursements. You can click on the link to set up your Reimbursify account.

  • I understand that life happens and we can’t always predict unexpected or emergency scenarios. However, I do ask that if it is an emergency (not a work conflict), that you let me know as soon as you can.

    The session slot, (i.e. Mondays at 2pm), will be yours until we terminate our meetings. If you feel that the day and time needs to be adjusted since we had to reschedule them, please let me know and I would be happy to change to a time that works for both of us.

    Unfortunately, I cannot reschedule another client if you do not attend the session. If it is a late cancellation, you will be charged the full fee and your insurance will not cover cancelled sessions.

  • If a client is 5 minutes late for our meeting, I will be sending out an email to ask if you are available to attend the session. If I do not receive a response within 10 minutes, you will be charged the late cancellation fee.

    If we run into three consecutive rescheduled or late cancellation meetings, we will need to discuss if the time aligns with your schedule or if you would like a referral.

    Goodness of fit, communication, and consistent meeting times are beneficial to seeing improvements.

  • I highly encourage clients to take necessary time off when they need it. Or if you have an exciting opportunity to move in your profession.

    In those cases, please let me know of an upcoming or scheduled vacation or job interview as early as possible so that you will not be charged.

  • I will make sure that whenever I will be out of town/the country, to let you know 2-4 weeks in advance. There will be coverage by one of my colleagues with their name and contact information if emergency sessions are needed.

    Every quarter (beginning of March, June, September, and December), I will be taking a few days off. Before I take time off in our last session, we will discuss any feedback or check-ins needed.